This is actually a really simple concept. You can’t control anything (especially the mind of someone else) if you can’t control your own state of mind.
Think of it like this.
Your mind is like a movie theater that plays the movie that you decide on. The question is, what would you rather have playing? A depressing horror movie or a beautiful story with a happy ending?
If your internal representations are ruining you , then you need to take back control of your mind. The first step is by creating new movies in your mind (even if you don’t really believe them at first).
Visualize yourself as the same physical character but with new powers. Begin to see yourself as the hero rather than the victim. A large part of this also has to do with the language that you use.
Most people have no idea how much negative energy they create out of thin air by simply using words and phrases like “I can’t”, “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not smart enough”, “I could never do that”, etc.
Realize that you create your own reality. It begins with how you talk to yourself. let that voice by a secret weapon of inspiration that gives you the power to overcome obstacles rather than a parasite that feeds off of your negativity and spirals out of control.
FACT: Most people who dream of getting rich by winning the lottery almost never do.
And statistically those who do usually wind up broke again within a few years.
Because they’ve created a mind set which states “That which I desire comes from external resources rather than from those that naturally reside within me”.
They believe that wealth can only come as result of “luck”.
This automatically relinquishes their control over their circumstances and positions them as the victim rather than the victor. Not a good thing.
2. Control The Subject’s State of Mind
Once you have your own state of mind under control you can begin controlling the minds of others.
You can do this by appealing to the windows of his mind which include his:
A. Internal Representations
You need to determine the type of movie your subject is playing in his mind and how it’s serving him. If it’s one of doom and gloom, show him a sneak peak of what could be by taking what you have to offer.
Now sometimes he might not be aware of what he has to change. In other words, he could be painting a beautiful picture in his mind but it’s not conducive to his reality.
If this is the case, you have to briefly inject him with a dose of the scary ending that could be coming that he’s not aware of. Then show him what he must do to avoid it.
In certain cases, the internal change that you need to have him create in his mind comes from the act of movement. In NLP, we call this a pattern interrupt. You’re simply interrupting his pattern of thinking so you an redirect it where you want it to be. You can do this any number of different ways.
Drop a pen on the floor. Hand him a pen. Hand him a drink of water. Take him for a walk. Go for lunch. Give him a brochure or a book and direct him where to look.
Remember, if he’s in a stuck state he’s not open to suggestion. Break the state, redirect and resume.
3. Gather And Utilize Data
People who win always gather information about their subject and utilize it advantageously.
Professional fighters do this all the time. They study the tapes of their opponents fights to see what patterns they follow so they have a better understanding of how to fight him.
The same is true of truly professional sales people. They always gather as much data as they possibly can about their prospect before making a presentation.
With the Internet as it is today it’s relatively simple to find out information abut someone.
Almost a billion people are on Facebook alone with a profile that tells you where they live, what they enjoy doing, what kind of music they listen to and what sports teams they like.
The key to using this this data to your advantage is very simple.
Look for and subtly highlight any similarities that you may have and more importantly, avoid any differences.
The second part is especially important because just as similarities positively impact an interaction exponentially, differences do the same but in a negative way.
4. Master Power-Linking
Power linking is really just a fancy word for networking. I came up with it all by myself 🙂
Seriously though, I can’t emphasize the importance of networking enough.
But as a person who understands influence, you probably already know how powerful relationships are.
Let me put it this way.
When I was in sales, it was my networking that took me to six figures.
And when I started my own digital business?
Well I wouldn’t even have it if I didn’t leverage my relationships with other Internet marketers.
Here’s the thing though.
Networking only works if you have at least one of three things. You are the best at what you do, you have great products and/or you have great services.
Focus on solving the problems of others and you should have no problems of your own achieving these things.
The next step is asking.
If you need help, ask for it. But only do after you’ve provided value.
5. Be Proactive
Sitting around and waiting for opportunities to magically appear out of know where is going to leave you very disappointed.
Just go ahead and give it a try if you don’t believe me.
Think of something that you want, close your eyes for a minute and then open them. Did it appear?
I think you get the point.
The difference between those who always get what they want and those who just want what they don’t get is the fact that the first group of people actually go and “get” what they want.
You must work your self up into a white heat of desire (as Napoleon Hill calls it) to become a person who is always seeking the right people to obtain help from and then find them as if you’re life depended on it.
Once you find them, create value and solve their problems.
Then utilize the law of reciprocity and ask for the help you need.